THIRTY TWO

“I have been a member of the church my whole life, and I have always known that it was true.

For the first part of my life, things always seemed to make sense and fell into place. Whenever I had a question for the Lord, the answer always seemed obvious.

Eventually, however, my husband and I had a big decision to make. We talked about it, prayed about it, and both came to the same answer, so we acted on it. Everything fell apart in a spectacular way. It was a somewhat dark time for me, spiritually and mentally. I began to doubt the revelation we had received, and whether or not I could trust myself to understand Heavenly Father’s promptings.

For years, even though I continued to pray because I knew I should, I struggled with getting answers and promptings. It even began to affect my mental and physical health. After years of this, and other struggles that have come into my life, and pushing through, I have come to realize that Heavenly Father wanted me to come even closer to Him. It wasn’t enough to just give me the answers, I needed to get to know Him better, and understand better how He acts for me and blesses my life. But I needed that foundation of always knowing it was true and that things would work out, in order to make me keep trying and pushing. Life will probably never be as easy as it was when I was younger. It was never intended to stay that way. There is no growth without opposition.”