“I was introduced to the church by my now husband, in 2008. I would attend Sunday services with him here and there, and I would also welcome missionaries into my home whenever they’d ask to visit me.
There were many things that I saw in the way members behaved that I was not use to seeing in my everyday people. People greeted you at church and had conversations after services, you’d see members throughout the week at each other’s houses, and kids knew how to search for specific scriptures.
A few years later, I was still not a member. I grew up living very much in the world and didn’t see myself changing because I didn’t see a need to. Since my dad had passed 2007 my time had revolved around school, friends, soccer, dancing, and parties. I didn’t like being home without friends because I didn’t like reminiscing on old memories. I thought I was tough enough to never have to face those unwanted buried emotions. That same year, I married my husband and we welcomed our daughter into the world, and still didn’t see a need to change. I still welcomed missionaries when they’d ask, but I wouldn’t do it for me I just thought it was rude to say no. So, I’d listen to what they’d teach but wouldn’t really take to heart what they were saying.
My husband never stopped attending church and would even take our daughter with him. I’d tag along here and there, but again church was not a priority and by this time I would think to myself “I can’t be baptized just because my husband is a member; I don’t believe in the things they teach; and my family would laugh at me” among other thoughts.
Year after year when the days got shorter, I grew mean and angry due to my seasonal depression. I lived to please myself and provide for my daughter. I didn’t have many goals with my husband. We kind of just lived for the day. This cycle continued until 2014. My depression got the best of me. I was unhappy with myself and with my life. I isolated myself from those who cared about me and spent my free time in dark rooms as I couldn’t care to live. My daughter was well taken care of by my family, my husband, and his family. I envisioned her growing up without even remembering who I ever was because I felt that unimportant. My mom told me I needed to try everything possible to regain my joy.
One day as we talked about The Church of Jesus Christ, she asked if they taught anything that was mean or caused harm. I replied no. She then said if it’s not bad and you have nothing to lose then why don’t you just give it a try? Hearing this was a shock to me because my mom was not a church member and I thought family members would laugh if I ever thought about joining “the Mormons”. I thought, “what do I have to lose?” and I reached out to the missionaries.
I was finally ready to hear what they had to teach. I prayed and asked to know if these things were true but I got no answer. I got nothing. One day the Sister Missionaries paid me a visit with a member of the ward. After that lesson, the member that was with them said she got a prompting to ask me if I’d like to be baptized. My mom’s words came to mind and I took the leap of faith and said “yes.” I still hadn’t received my beam of light with the dove flying across the sky, but what could I lose? My verification that I chose the right came on the day of my baptism.
It’s 2021, I am still learning everyday but I have a testimony that our faith can be as small as a mustard seed and grow into something big and strong as long as you take that leap to sow it in the dirt. My Heavenly Father allowed me to seek the help I needed to release the emotions I kept inside for so long and helped my depression be minimally present. Thanks to his love and teachings my relationship with my husband has strengthened and grown. We were sealed inthe Temple in 2016 and now have a total of 3 children. I have never not had a calling and will continue to serve where the lord needs me. I love my Savior and live to follow his example every day.”
I Am Converted 