THIRTY EIGHT

“I joined the Church when I was in college. Faith in Jesus Christ has always been part of who I am. I’ve always believed He’s my Savior, and I’ve never doubted that there’s a God who created me. I know that I’m a child of a Heavenly Father who cares about me and wants me to live a life of joy and happiness. I also believe that life on earth comes with experiences that we can’t explain and that require more faith than we sometimes feel we can muster. To be honest, I don’t enjoy doing difficult things.

One of those things that’s been a challenge for me is reconciling my faith with the fact that I experience same-sex attraction. Growing up, I didn’t see a way to be a follower of Christ and to have these feelings and I never imagined there were others like me in the church. Thankfully, I now know that there are many in the LGBT+ community who love the Lord, who love serving together in the Church, and who teach me things about coming closer to Christ I couldn’t learn from anyone else. 

I’m learning things about empathy, compassion, trust, and self-forgiveness that I don’t think I could have learned any other way. In that sense, I’ve come to see this part of me as an opportunity to learn from Heavenly Father, not something for which I should feel shame. I believe that many parts of my character associated with being gay are those things that help me become a better person.

Sharing my story is still a vulnerable thing, but I share it because I know there are others in the Church who are experiencing what I experience. I want them to know that it’s not something to fear – even though I know it can feel that way. The Lord knows us, and He loves us for who we are, not in spite of what we experience. He wants to succor us in our difficulties and times of doubt. It is entirely possible to live true to Him within the context of His plan and be our authentic selves. It is possible to be a member of the Church and gay and to rejoice in the goodness of this life.“